"I Am Number 4" PG 13
Based on the Legacies saga of teen books, the story of the Lorians and their enemies seems a cross between Starman, Stargate, X Files and Twilight. The movie stars the brawny dude from Beastly, (not reviewed), who is 'Number 4" an alien from a planet of fog monsters that can turn into people, but when you kill them they sparkle and fall apart into vapors. Apparently some others of his 'clan' have been killed and this blonde alien (who could be one of the Garde, the Lorien 'children), ), and these bald aliens are after him. He decides to go with his guardian, another alien, to live in a small town and attend high school, which is hardly the place for an alien to be low profile. In some weird way it makes sense if you're 14 when you wrote this script. Maybe the writers were, or recalled a similar story, like Starman. Imitation being a form of flattery, could an angst filled teen version of Starman work? It could if you play it for laughs. They did not. (Starman was the story of a vapory alien who assumes human form to learn about humanity. It was both a movie and a short run TV series. He has powers that makes his hands and body glow. He can make power come out, has mega intelligence and strength, etc, alien stuff). Brooding and serious 'teen' alien is misunderstood and befriends the ex girlfriend cheerleader of the school jock, fights the jock later, exposes his powers, and the alien bounty hunters pick up his scent. One would think if there are only 9 of them and 3 are dead these Lorians wouldn't be so blatant using their powers. Even the guardian warns him of this to no avail. His little dog is also something special too, but it's only relevant in the end. The big showdown with the Megadarians (yes, that's their name, big door aliens), will be in the high school after hours, with bungling cops, alien bounty hunters, and a nod to Blade, (hey why not rip off Blade, right), and a finish which leads to the sequels presented in the book series. Problem is the characters are so unlikeable you don't care if they live or die. The alien Number 4 guy is so obviously brooding and over acted that he is so annoying you almost root for the bounty hunters. The appeal is in that it plays like a rejected superhero plot from Marvel's Avengers, which could have been fun if it had been campy, not serious. Problem is it was too serious.Ther hero's power seem to be mega strength from his glowing flashlight beam hands, sort of like Superman and Iron Man, and a little of the guy from Heroes. In fact, it's a lot like Heroes. Also why would the bad guys kill them in sequential order and give them numbers? All the heroes would have to do is switch numbers and lead to total confusion for the enemies! And if they can't, why not? If they turn into vapor when they die, what's to prevent them from simply solidifying again somewhere else? Do they melt often? Why is an alien teenager (who is likely 25 with a body like that), even remotely acting like a human teenager? Does he have to act like the vampire from Twilight? (It isn't him). He book series is probably better. (Haven't read it). The Megadorian hunters act like stock villains and give no motivation for trying to off the good aliens. It seems they're just doing it because they're evil, which the guardian actually said at one point. And that guardian kind of sucked, as you'd think he would demand the younger alien keep moving, not going to school, because he's on the lam and those things can track him if he accidentally uses his hand flashlights or mega powers. Chalk it up to high fantasy but there should at least be some likeable moments in this.
Review by Adam Browne
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