Comedy: Sorry to Bother You
Drama: A Star is Born, Bohemian Rhapsody, Mid 90's
Winner: A Star is Born
Science Fiction: Bumblebee, Black Panther, Avengers Infinity War, Solo, Wonder Woman
Winner: Black Panther, mention, Avengers Infinity War, Bumblebee
Horror: Overlord, Halloween 4.0
Winner: Overlord
Action: Mission Impossible Fallout, Spider Man Into The Spider Verse, Ant Man and the Wasp
Winner: Spider Man Into the Spider Verse
Animation: Spider Man Into the Spider Verse, Isle of Dogs, Incredibles 2, Ralph Breaks the Internet
Winner: Isle of Dogs, Spider Man Into the Spider Verse
Video: Batman Ninja
Foreign Film: Enthiran 2.0
Actor: Rami Malik, Bohemian Rhapsody
Actress: Lady Gaga, A Star is Born, Haylee Steinfeld, Bumblebee
Winner: Lady Gaga
In House: Trans Tech Return of the Shadow Children
Best Picture of the Year
A Star is Born, Bohemian Rhapsody, Black Panther, Bumblebee, Overlord, Avengers Infinity War,
Winners: Bohemian Rhapsody, A Star is Born and Black Panther
Well, for originality and hostry, Black Panther
Worst Picture:
Red Sparrow, Death Wish, A Wrinkle in Time
Loser: Red Sparrow
Monday, December 24, 2018
Christmas Eve and Movie Reviews 2018 Additions
"Spider Man Into The Spider Verse" PG
Sony and some other studios, and a little Marvel, teamed up to make an animated comic book come to life in this origin story for Miles Morales, the Puerto Rican Spider Boy, who's uncle turns out to be a villain, and the blocky Kingpin gets to kill one of the Spider Men while opening a machine to suck other people from various dimensions into his, partly to save his family. The 'blurry art' and rfrantic pacing at times can be distracting, but the five versions of Spider People are interesting, and their team up is amazing. You even have Noir Spider Man and Spider Ham the pig, and Spider Gwen, and Penny Parker from the Japanese one. See it in theaters. Own it on bluray. Great film.
"Bumblebee" PG
It took the makers of Transformers 5 tries to get it right. The fans had it right all along. The sixth movie in the franchise of live action films is a spin off taking place in 1987, sort of a reboot, done by a director who knows what he's doing for once. Think ET meets Herbie the Love Bug meets Transformers. The heart of this movie is in the right place, from the stunning opening scene, on Cybertron, to the downed soldier alien who has to pretend to be a beat up VW bug to blend in, and befriends a young woman shy of her turning 18. Charlie is the Carly the show needed 10 years ago. The character needs to be a kind of unsure nerd, but not overly bombastic about it. It works. The Decepticons are two right out of the fan stories, even some of mine, and are edgy in the right places, and have actual gravity, unlike in the Bay versions. Bumblebee actually was a chattery duyde in the G1, but that's forgiven enough. The flick is worth seeing in theaters and owning on bluray.
"Aquaman" PG 13
The DC universe does a retro origin story for Aquaman, one of the most powerful and yet silliest characters in their arsenal, played by a buffed wrestler type dude, seen in the Justice League movie. He is similar to Bane, more so than Aquaman. His story seems a pastiche of The Little Mermaid, complete with redhead sidekick, with ineffective father figure, Thor's Asgard, and Black Panther's Wakanda. Distracting visuals make for enough of an adventure and enough chansing it' not boring, but it can be overlong with the forced chemistry from the leads. And also the ending rips of How to Train your Dragon 2, and Thor 2. Also there are some pacing issues. It's better than their usual fare, one to see in theaters, but it is not as good as Wonder Woman or the Batman movies. The delightful Lovecraftian squid monster was fun. The prissy king wanna be that constantly challenges the lead, and the questionable Black Manta, are noted as being stereotypes. But the story still works.
Sony and some other studios, and a little Marvel, teamed up to make an animated comic book come to life in this origin story for Miles Morales, the Puerto Rican Spider Boy, who's uncle turns out to be a villain, and the blocky Kingpin gets to kill one of the Spider Men while opening a machine to suck other people from various dimensions into his, partly to save his family. The 'blurry art' and rfrantic pacing at times can be distracting, but the five versions of Spider People are interesting, and their team up is amazing. You even have Noir Spider Man and Spider Ham the pig, and Spider Gwen, and Penny Parker from the Japanese one. See it in theaters. Own it on bluray. Great film.
"Bumblebee" PG
It took the makers of Transformers 5 tries to get it right. The fans had it right all along. The sixth movie in the franchise of live action films is a spin off taking place in 1987, sort of a reboot, done by a director who knows what he's doing for once. Think ET meets Herbie the Love Bug meets Transformers. The heart of this movie is in the right place, from the stunning opening scene, on Cybertron, to the downed soldier alien who has to pretend to be a beat up VW bug to blend in, and befriends a young woman shy of her turning 18. Charlie is the Carly the show needed 10 years ago. The character needs to be a kind of unsure nerd, but not overly bombastic about it. It works. The Decepticons are two right out of the fan stories, even some of mine, and are edgy in the right places, and have actual gravity, unlike in the Bay versions. Bumblebee actually was a chattery duyde in the G1, but that's forgiven enough. The flick is worth seeing in theaters and owning on bluray.
"Aquaman" PG 13
The DC universe does a retro origin story for Aquaman, one of the most powerful and yet silliest characters in their arsenal, played by a buffed wrestler type dude, seen in the Justice League movie. He is similar to Bane, more so than Aquaman. His story seems a pastiche of The Little Mermaid, complete with redhead sidekick, with ineffective father figure, Thor's Asgard, and Black Panther's Wakanda. Distracting visuals make for enough of an adventure and enough chansing it' not boring, but it can be overlong with the forced chemistry from the leads. And also the ending rips of How to Train your Dragon 2, and Thor 2. Also there are some pacing issues. It's better than their usual fare, one to see in theaters, but it is not as good as Wonder Woman or the Batman movies. The delightful Lovecraftian squid monster was fun. The prissy king wanna be that constantly challenges the lead, and the questionable Black Manta, are noted as being stereotypes. But the story still works.
Tuesday, December 18, 2018
Early Favorites for the Movie Awards Clara Nominees
The Clara Movie Awards, year 28, since 1990.
Ratings based on actual movies seen by Kat or Cards.
Ratings not paid for or endorsing any studio.
Based on their rating from the blog show after seeing the films live.
Comedy
Sorry to Bother You
Cock Blockers
Drama
A Star is Born
Bohemian Rhapsody
Mid 90's
Documentary
Bohemian Rhapsody
Fahrenheit 11/9
Mid 90's
Science Fiction/Fantasy
Annihilation
Black Panther
Avengers Infinity War
Solo a Star Wars story
Horror/Thriller
Halloween 4.0
Overlord
Action
Mission Impossible: Fallout
Animated
Isle of Dogs
Incredibles 2
Ralph Breaks the Internet
Video
Batman Ninja (direct to video)
Foreign Film
Enthiran 2.0
Best film of the year noms:
A Star is Born
Black Panther
Fahrenheit 11/9
Bohemian Rhapsody
Overlord
Avengers: Infinity War
Best Actress, Lady Ga Ga (Star)
Best Actor: Rami Malik (Bohemian)
Worst film of the year noms:
A Wrinkle in Time
Red Sparrow
Death Wish
In House
Trans Tech: Return of the Shadow Children
The Clara Movie Awards (1990-present) are a pop culture review done now for the internet, since 2009, and feature only films that Adam or Jon (Kat and Cards) have seen. Movies they have not seen are not nominated.
This is in no way a scientific poll or a popularity poll, although some movies we pick do go on to win best in categories at Oscar time.
Ratings based on actual movies seen by Kat or Cards.
Ratings not paid for or endorsing any studio.
Based on their rating from the blog show after seeing the films live.
Comedy
Sorry to Bother You
Cock Blockers
Drama
A Star is Born
Bohemian Rhapsody
Mid 90's
Documentary
Bohemian Rhapsody
Fahrenheit 11/9
Mid 90's
Science Fiction/Fantasy
Annihilation
Black Panther
Avengers Infinity War
Solo a Star Wars story
Horror/Thriller
Halloween 4.0
Overlord
Action
Mission Impossible: Fallout
Animated
Isle of Dogs
Incredibles 2
Ralph Breaks the Internet
Video
Batman Ninja (direct to video)
Foreign Film
Enthiran 2.0
Best film of the year noms:
A Star is Born
Black Panther
Fahrenheit 11/9
Bohemian Rhapsody
Overlord
Avengers: Infinity War
Best Actress, Lady Ga Ga (Star)
Best Actor: Rami Malik (Bohemian)
Worst film of the year noms:
A Wrinkle in Time
Red Sparrow
Death Wish
In House
Trans Tech: Return of the Shadow Children
The Clara Movie Awards (1990-present) are a pop culture review done now for the internet, since 2009, and feature only films that Adam or Jon (Kat and Cards) have seen. Movies they have not seen are not nominated.
This is in no way a scientific poll or a popularity poll, although some movies we pick do go on to win best in categories at Oscar time.
Movie Reviews into Mid December 2018
"Ralph Breaks the Internet" PG
Wreck It Ralph and Penelope Schweets return in this send up to all things good about being online. In the sequel, Ralph accidentally causes Penelope's game to break, so they have to go into the internet, somehow defying how that might work, and get a replacement part for it on EBay. They go about this in no way realistically, but it's a cartoon. They also visit GTA5, called here Slaughter Race, and Ralph gets the creepy when he is rejected, and accidentally unleases a cloning virus that makes a billion of him that turns into a monster he has to stop. Not as cute as the first one. The best gag is not even in the movie, but in the end credits. The flick has moments, and is far better than similar paced Imogi Movie. Clingy boy or girlfriends will not be pleased with this film. Ha.
"Enthiran 2.0" Unrated, probably PG 13
Strange and hyper kinetic sequel to Enthiran, a Bollywood space science fiction film that was basically Bicentennial Man meets I Robot, with a little Terminator, comes from across the world in India. The flick was dubbed into English. It is straight up nod to Transformers, Terminator, buddy sitcoms, and action pictures, and heavily influenced by GI Joe and by James Bond and Jackie Chan. The smart witted robot must Chitti must team up with the professor and his literal femme bot Girl Friday type android to stop a mad attack of cellphone 'bird' ghosts who have possessed the city's cell network, and have transformed their lot into a Karma Bird made of millions of brightly lit phones! It's the Dovetastic movie, if he directed it, which he did not. It was someone else. The phone transformer is killing people, so it turns out that this other professor killed himself, and his spirit was brought back via the birds he had buried after they died, and it's time for revenge on the city. The good professor is then captured and possessed, and then Chitti, badly damaged in the attack, is upgraded to 2.0, spouting references of Indian pop culture while fighting off the mecha bots with an arsonal of weapons, and likely scores of innocent bystanders and hostages being decimated. It was truly the most insane foreign film ever. Not for kids, but teenagers will not have trouble with it. It's even hyper enough to keep you watching for the long running time over over 2 hours.
"The Grinch" PG
Illumination retelling of the famous 1960s cartoon short, and the 2000s Jim Carey flick, is somewhere between the two, not as good as the short, and not as horrid and nightmare bad as the other one. It falls somewhere in the middle. The back story is not really necessary, as the Grinch having been an orphan kind of defeats the purpose of the story. Then the Who's are just a little too trusting of the guy who laters steals their stuff, only to return it after being corndered by Cindy Lu playing like she and her friends are like they're from an old Cartoon Network series, Codename Kids Next Door, and can fight crime, and catch Santa, only to discover he's the Grinch actually, stealing their stuff. Grinch then turns good for some reason and returns their stuff.
"The Mortal Engines" PG 13
In a distant future not dissimilar to the 3000s of Battlefield Earth, after a quantum nuclear war, cities are built up on giant tank treads, having maws to eat smaller cities, and roam around quite rapidly eating each other. Rebel red scarf wearing anime rip off girl breaks into the evil London mecha city and tries to meet up with an inventor archeologist there, but instead is kicked off the city with his assistant, a clueless young man, and they both go on an adventure together. Then they meet up with some flying Airbender/Korra/Winds on Hanonomi rip off characters who had a balloon city, and are chased by a mechanical 'Resurrected Man' who wants the girl's soul because she promised it to him. Turns out she was another archeologist's daughter, and has some past with trhe bearded bad guy of the London city. Bearded guy wants to destroy the Eastern Wall, which seems to be in the Apls or something, except the people there are Asians, on the Europe side of the range, not the other side. Eh? One of them earlier explained the continents were all shattered, but still that doesn't explain how that is possible. Well, the cities roam the Earth on treads, so that's already silly, because if they could do that, why couldn't they just rebuild society? Oh, they forgot. Maybe tghat was just an oversight. It's much easier to construct giant monster cities and ravage the wastelands that actually...rebuild everything. Most of the oddities were added for the film, even a silly nod to the Minions as 'American Gods' at one point. Liked the idea of the rebel lady decreeing at one point, 'Oh no, we're not goin to have the sad story talk now!" Ha. Not a bad flick. Fairly interesting. Most of the actors are not too memorable, but it was fun. Similar feel to Jackson's King Kong movie.
Wreck It Ralph and Penelope Schweets return in this send up to all things good about being online. In the sequel, Ralph accidentally causes Penelope's game to break, so they have to go into the internet, somehow defying how that might work, and get a replacement part for it on EBay. They go about this in no way realistically, but it's a cartoon. They also visit GTA5, called here Slaughter Race, and Ralph gets the creepy when he is rejected, and accidentally unleases a cloning virus that makes a billion of him that turns into a monster he has to stop. Not as cute as the first one. The best gag is not even in the movie, but in the end credits. The flick has moments, and is far better than similar paced Imogi Movie. Clingy boy or girlfriends will not be pleased with this film. Ha.
"Enthiran 2.0" Unrated, probably PG 13
Strange and hyper kinetic sequel to Enthiran, a Bollywood space science fiction film that was basically Bicentennial Man meets I Robot, with a little Terminator, comes from across the world in India. The flick was dubbed into English. It is straight up nod to Transformers, Terminator, buddy sitcoms, and action pictures, and heavily influenced by GI Joe and by James Bond and Jackie Chan. The smart witted robot must Chitti must team up with the professor and his literal femme bot Girl Friday type android to stop a mad attack of cellphone 'bird' ghosts who have possessed the city's cell network, and have transformed their lot into a Karma Bird made of millions of brightly lit phones! It's the Dovetastic movie, if he directed it, which he did not. It was someone else. The phone transformer is killing people, so it turns out that this other professor killed himself, and his spirit was brought back via the birds he had buried after they died, and it's time for revenge on the city. The good professor is then captured and possessed, and then Chitti, badly damaged in the attack, is upgraded to 2.0, spouting references of Indian pop culture while fighting off the mecha bots with an arsonal of weapons, and likely scores of innocent bystanders and hostages being decimated. It was truly the most insane foreign film ever. Not for kids, but teenagers will not have trouble with it. It's even hyper enough to keep you watching for the long running time over over 2 hours.
"The Grinch" PG
Illumination retelling of the famous 1960s cartoon short, and the 2000s Jim Carey flick, is somewhere between the two, not as good as the short, and not as horrid and nightmare bad as the other one. It falls somewhere in the middle. The back story is not really necessary, as the Grinch having been an orphan kind of defeats the purpose of the story. Then the Who's are just a little too trusting of the guy who laters steals their stuff, only to return it after being corndered by Cindy Lu playing like she and her friends are like they're from an old Cartoon Network series, Codename Kids Next Door, and can fight crime, and catch Santa, only to discover he's the Grinch actually, stealing their stuff. Grinch then turns good for some reason and returns their stuff.
"The Mortal Engines" PG 13
In a distant future not dissimilar to the 3000s of Battlefield Earth, after a quantum nuclear war, cities are built up on giant tank treads, having maws to eat smaller cities, and roam around quite rapidly eating each other. Rebel red scarf wearing anime rip off girl breaks into the evil London mecha city and tries to meet up with an inventor archeologist there, but instead is kicked off the city with his assistant, a clueless young man, and they both go on an adventure together. Then they meet up with some flying Airbender/Korra/Winds on Hanonomi rip off characters who had a balloon city, and are chased by a mechanical 'Resurrected Man' who wants the girl's soul because she promised it to him. Turns out she was another archeologist's daughter, and has some past with trhe bearded bad guy of the London city. Bearded guy wants to destroy the Eastern Wall, which seems to be in the Apls or something, except the people there are Asians, on the Europe side of the range, not the other side. Eh? One of them earlier explained the continents were all shattered, but still that doesn't explain how that is possible. Well, the cities roam the Earth on treads, so that's already silly, because if they could do that, why couldn't they just rebuild society? Oh, they forgot. Maybe tghat was just an oversight. It's much easier to construct giant monster cities and ravage the wastelands that actually...rebuild everything. Most of the oddities were added for the film, even a silly nod to the Minions as 'American Gods' at one point. Liked the idea of the rebel lady decreeing at one point, 'Oh no, we're not goin to have the sad story talk now!" Ha. Not a bad flick. Fairly interesting. Most of the actors are not too memorable, but it was fun. Similar feel to Jackson's King Kong movie.
Monday, November 19, 2018
Movie Reviews Up To Thanksgiving 2018
"Sony's Venom" R
Tom Hardy is transported to San Francisco to avoid the Spiderman universe in this odd take on the antihero Venom from Son.y He tries very had to be Deadpool in this movie. At times, it seems to work, but mostly it's kind of a hot mess. When scientists bring alien parasites in cansiters to Eargh, one of them means to infect hapless people with the symbiots to see what they do, and to see if they're compatible. The scientist is clearly a twisted version of Elon Musk, from contemporary times, and it really doesn't make sense. His motivation in this is cheesy. He is doing it to perfect humanity, or some other drivel, using aliens from a comet or asteroid. Vemon is created when hapless Eddie Brock is caught up in it, and the snarky black goo covering bad guy rises, with a taste for eating heads off. You don't actually see such a graphic thing, but it is implied and suggested.
"Halloween 2018" R
Halloween 40 is here, the 40th year of the franchise. Returning is Loaurie Strode, now no longer the sister of Meyers, because we're ignoring the second movie and all of the others, and the Shape, and a whole cast. Carpenter helped produce the film, so it goes back to the roots of the original, and succeeds in making The Shape once again the boogeyman, scary, a killing machine, with no moral direction. He merely takes out anyone in his way, and even when they're not. Also there are messed up teenagers, as usual, but in the film they spend most of their time getting high or being picked off by the melted Shatner masked killer. This Halloween was actually worth the watch. So they even ignore H2O from 20 years back, and pretend like it never happened. So there is this vast alternate timeline bush ot timelines out there. They even have a Loomis. Could be the best horror film so far of the year.
"Mid '90's" R
Although the reviewer was an 80's kid, at least one nephew was a '90's kid, and would like this movie, so it was worth a watch. The movie is directed by a Superbad alum, but he doesn't do comedty this time around. Sometimes called the "Lighter version of Kids", the midle 1990s AIDS parable film, it really is not all that dark. It's just not a comedy. The movie is about foive friends who are skater losers hanging out in an LA like town, where there isn't much to do. The boy plays off a family who are kind of dorks, and the Mother used to be a party girl, but had given that up. The boy and his wuss older brother fight, a bit like the dynamic in that bad Vacation remake, but here it works much better. For the gang, they seem obsessed with trying to do stunts and get hurt, but are amazed the boy pulls through. Not an Oscar film, but surely in the ballpark, er, skate park. Maybe best actor.
"Bohemian Rhapsody" R
Rami Malik replaced earlier Shasha Baron Cohewn to play the titular rock icon, Freddy Mercury of Queen in this rocking biopic story. Also they replaced the director. The movie has enough Queen songs for any fan, and is quite nioce to the life of Mercury, even when he fell from grace on occasion in the story. They do address the AIDS, despite the rumors from critics who evidently didn't actually see it. Also the last 30 minutes are basically Live Aids for Africa 1985 all over again. As a kid othe '80s, that was awesome, and well done. Can't say they got anything wrong there. It was pretty darn close. Maybe the audio was too good, and not hissy, but you can't make audio hissy nowadays. Mike Meyers as a "composite" rock promoter cheekily claiming the titrle song is "6 minutes, which is 3 minutes too long", from the trailer, is ironic considering his Wayne's World character played the set in the movie, in the 1990s. The actual Mercury died in 1991. Malik needs to get a best actor nod for this film. He was amazing! He channeled the King of Pop of England of the time. (Our King of Pop was Michael Jackson at the time).
"Overlord" R
It seemed JJ Abrams got the memo and dropped making Overlord about Cloverfield, and made it just about a crazed super soldier making Nazi scientist in WW2 France. When some paratroopers go down before D Day, they are trapped in a small town in France where there is a crazed Nazi commandant who has been experiemnting on villagers to create the super uber race. The men discover one of them, and then a girl who had a little brother, and an aunt who is mutated from the tests. They help the girl to defeat the commandant, only to have him flee after breaking out using the serum. Then they had to go and stop him before he unleases a horde of zombies, and also to blow up the tower. is a decent war picture, not Oscar bait, but decent.
"Fantastic Beasts 2: The Crimes of Grindelwald" PG 13
Grindewald is a demented wizard from the end notes of the Harry Potter books, specifically from Fantastic Beasts, a textbook in the story. ust basing an entire new series as a prequel to the original, set 90 years beforehand, is problematic, and it doesn't really jell. It does look pretty, and has some nice horror moments, but it is missing a lot when you don't really have a story to tell. Grindelwald and Dumbedore had a falling out some years before, and that is why Dumbledonre can't fight him, so he sends Scemander to do it, which kind of makes no sense. Also we know that in the textbook, it is Dumbledore who will defeat him in 1945, which means at this rate it will be 10 movies before they get to see that! Ug, not such a good idea. Seeing Hogwarts again new and pristine, and the Ministry of Magic, are cool set pieces, although the US one and the French one seem tacked on. Also it's odd the magic is more hyper kinetic and better than in the first movies, implying some of it went downhill.We also get to meet Nigini the snake girl. And we get to meet the first LeStrange. Not sure how this will all play out. Worth seeing in theaters though. Yates returns to direct. Rowling produces.
Tom Hardy is transported to San Francisco to avoid the Spiderman universe in this odd take on the antihero Venom from Son.y He tries very had to be Deadpool in this movie. At times, it seems to work, but mostly it's kind of a hot mess. When scientists bring alien parasites in cansiters to Eargh, one of them means to infect hapless people with the symbiots to see what they do, and to see if they're compatible. The scientist is clearly a twisted version of Elon Musk, from contemporary times, and it really doesn't make sense. His motivation in this is cheesy. He is doing it to perfect humanity, or some other drivel, using aliens from a comet or asteroid. Vemon is created when hapless Eddie Brock is caught up in it, and the snarky black goo covering bad guy rises, with a taste for eating heads off. You don't actually see such a graphic thing, but it is implied and suggested.
"Halloween 2018" R
Halloween 40 is here, the 40th year of the franchise. Returning is Loaurie Strode, now no longer the sister of Meyers, because we're ignoring the second movie and all of the others, and the Shape, and a whole cast. Carpenter helped produce the film, so it goes back to the roots of the original, and succeeds in making The Shape once again the boogeyman, scary, a killing machine, with no moral direction. He merely takes out anyone in his way, and even when they're not. Also there are messed up teenagers, as usual, but in the film they spend most of their time getting high or being picked off by the melted Shatner masked killer. This Halloween was actually worth the watch. So they even ignore H2O from 20 years back, and pretend like it never happened. So there is this vast alternate timeline bush ot timelines out there. They even have a Loomis. Could be the best horror film so far of the year.
"Mid '90's" R
Although the reviewer was an 80's kid, at least one nephew was a '90's kid, and would like this movie, so it was worth a watch. The movie is directed by a Superbad alum, but he doesn't do comedty this time around. Sometimes called the "Lighter version of Kids", the midle 1990s AIDS parable film, it really is not all that dark. It's just not a comedy. The movie is about foive friends who are skater losers hanging out in an LA like town, where there isn't much to do. The boy plays off a family who are kind of dorks, and the Mother used to be a party girl, but had given that up. The boy and his wuss older brother fight, a bit like the dynamic in that bad Vacation remake, but here it works much better. For the gang, they seem obsessed with trying to do stunts and get hurt, but are amazed the boy pulls through. Not an Oscar film, but surely in the ballpark, er, skate park. Maybe best actor.
"Bohemian Rhapsody" R
Rami Malik replaced earlier Shasha Baron Cohewn to play the titular rock icon, Freddy Mercury of Queen in this rocking biopic story. Also they replaced the director. The movie has enough Queen songs for any fan, and is quite nioce to the life of Mercury, even when he fell from grace on occasion in the story. They do address the AIDS, despite the rumors from critics who evidently didn't actually see it. Also the last 30 minutes are basically Live Aids for Africa 1985 all over again. As a kid othe '80s, that was awesome, and well done. Can't say they got anything wrong there. It was pretty darn close. Maybe the audio was too good, and not hissy, but you can't make audio hissy nowadays. Mike Meyers as a "composite" rock promoter cheekily claiming the titrle song is "6 minutes, which is 3 minutes too long", from the trailer, is ironic considering his Wayne's World character played the set in the movie, in the 1990s. The actual Mercury died in 1991. Malik needs to get a best actor nod for this film. He was amazing! He channeled the King of Pop of England of the time. (Our King of Pop was Michael Jackson at the time).
"Overlord" R
It seemed JJ Abrams got the memo and dropped making Overlord about Cloverfield, and made it just about a crazed super soldier making Nazi scientist in WW2 France. When some paratroopers go down before D Day, they are trapped in a small town in France where there is a crazed Nazi commandant who has been experiemnting on villagers to create the super uber race. The men discover one of them, and then a girl who had a little brother, and an aunt who is mutated from the tests. They help the girl to defeat the commandant, only to have him flee after breaking out using the serum. Then they had to go and stop him before he unleases a horde of zombies, and also to blow up the tower. is a decent war picture, not Oscar bait, but decent.
"Fantastic Beasts 2: The Crimes of Grindelwald" PG 13
Grindewald is a demented wizard from the end notes of the Harry Potter books, specifically from Fantastic Beasts, a textbook in the story. ust basing an entire new series as a prequel to the original, set 90 years beforehand, is problematic, and it doesn't really jell. It does look pretty, and has some nice horror moments, but it is missing a lot when you don't really have a story to tell. Grindelwald and Dumbedore had a falling out some years before, and that is why Dumbledonre can't fight him, so he sends Scemander to do it, which kind of makes no sense. Also we know that in the textbook, it is Dumbledore who will defeat him in 1945, which means at this rate it will be 10 movies before they get to see that! Ug, not such a good idea. Seeing Hogwarts again new and pristine, and the Ministry of Magic, are cool set pieces, although the US one and the French one seem tacked on. Also it's odd the magic is more hyper kinetic and better than in the first movies, implying some of it went downhill.We also get to meet Nigini the snake girl. And we get to meet the first LeStrange. Not sure how this will all play out. Worth seeing in theaters though. Yates returns to direct. Rowling produces.
Saturday, October 6, 2018
Short Reviews up to October 5 2018
See the longer reviews on my channel, on YouTube, WeirdKitty07, or Kal Kat reviews on channel 2.
"The Predator" R
The next reboot sequel in the Predator franchise that started in the 1980s with Arnie, returns with an odd combination of Halloween, Class of 1999, the Navigator, and Predator, the Predators delivers a frantic action set piece.The bizarre sexist dialog from the guy claiming he has Tourettes is annoying. Most of the maverick dog faced crazies on the bus are unlikable, so when the alien takes them out, it's like, well they deserved it. The movie's message seems to be "autism leads to genius hacking skills and superpowers" and "bad ass soldiers with guns are cool", and "child endangerment for scifi is okay". Mixing these in a soupy green glowing liquid makes you long for watching that strange one that took place on their planet, called Predators. It was never boring, but was more cringe worthy and seemed like Michael Bay was involved somewhere. The ending looks like they tacked it on. One actor just drops out, because as it was later revealed, he was actually a predator and got arrested, so that's ironic. Still popcorn fare. Movie is neither horrible or all that good. Stick with Predator.
"A House with a Clock in its Walls" PG
This is a strange Goosebumps like mix match of a beloved children's horror book of the 1980s, and a series, set to the tone of rock movie enthusiast Jack Black and dame of forest elves, Kate Blanchette, as magician sorcerers. Little orphaned boy goes to live with his uncle in his creepy Gothic Victorian house whiled used to be owned by a crazed warlock who put a clock in the house to scare them, and lead to his literal untimely resurrection. Weird chemistry between the leads seems to imply the two of them have a May-December thing. That's when a younger man and an older woman have a thing. However, having just looked into that, both are the same age! They're both 49, but she is made up to be older in the film with platinum hair and make up. This doesn't change the film though, where it is pretty good until the last act, where it turns into kind of a mess similar to the end of Ghostbuster 2016, which just a lot of blasting bewitched things, and a horrible CGI baby Jack. The boy actor is okay in the role. I have not read the books, but Marx Cards has. He has not seen the movie.
"Fahrenheit 11/9" R
Michael Moore of Bowling for Columbine fame returns to the Fahrenheit series for a follow up set during the rise of the Donald Trump administration. The first third of the film is about the bizarre popular vote rending Hilary Clinton loss, and the rise of the unexpected reality TV star, Donald Trump, yo the office of the president. Then he goes on about how previously Obama had finally come to Flint, his hometown, about the bad water, but then made a stunt about it, and did nothing. As best documentary of the year so far, the film does make you think the 2016 election was all rigged from the get go, but not like the conservatives claimed. It was rigged in their favor, and the liberals did no favors to prevent it, and making Hilarly their go to was a bad idea as it turned out. In my reeview, I encouraged them to run Oprah and Jon Stewart. Might as well.
"Small Foot" G
Small Foot is a film told from the perspective of insane Yeti creatures living on a mountain where they were conned by their charismatic leader into believing the lie that they were alone. Seems a lot like politics. Anyway, the WB movie cartoon is also a commentary on reality TV culture, does a good riff on Finding Bigfoot, and has fun with celeb shows with British dudes in them. When a plane crashed on the mountain, the isolated eager and questioning main character tries to prove he saw an actual Small Foot, and allies with the fringe outcasts to prove it. When he gets banished, he finds out that a whole new world lies below.Not a bad cartoon movie, if a little ham fisted.
"A Star is Born" R
All the critical buzz is on point for this film, as Lady Gaga nails a performance tour de force as an up and coming starlet in the fourth adaptation of A Star is Born, a movie made famous by Garland in the 1950s and Streisand in the 1970s. For a rare thing, this is in agreement here. The critics are right, and this should get not only Best Actress, but Best Picture of the Year, so far. The movie tells the story of a drunken falling celebrity cowboy rocker who meets a girl in a drag bar, and they fall in love. She is actually a girl, mind you. Well, just shy of 30, not a 'girl' anymore, but still. The man is called Jackson, and he is doing a spot on Kristofferson imitation, while Gaga seems to channel more Garland than the Babs. It is not payed for comedy. The chemistry they extrude is on point, and not ayt any time cringe worthy. Not just saying that because we're long time GaGa fans. This actually is something. This movie is groundbreaking. It is what La La Land tried to do, but was too campy and lacked some chemistry. You never bought they would be together for long in that movie. You kjnow they must be here, and it must end in typical Hamlet fashion. Everyone is solid from even some old time actors, and some you haven't seen in a while. Alcoholism and depression are themes. Not for children. Please don't take your kids to see this.
"The Predator" R
The next reboot sequel in the Predator franchise that started in the 1980s with Arnie, returns with an odd combination of Halloween, Class of 1999, the Navigator, and Predator, the Predators delivers a frantic action set piece.The bizarre sexist dialog from the guy claiming he has Tourettes is annoying. Most of the maverick dog faced crazies on the bus are unlikable, so when the alien takes them out, it's like, well they deserved it. The movie's message seems to be "autism leads to genius hacking skills and superpowers" and "bad ass soldiers with guns are cool", and "child endangerment for scifi is okay". Mixing these in a soupy green glowing liquid makes you long for watching that strange one that took place on their planet, called Predators. It was never boring, but was more cringe worthy and seemed like Michael Bay was involved somewhere. The ending looks like they tacked it on. One actor just drops out, because as it was later revealed, he was actually a predator and got arrested, so that's ironic. Still popcorn fare. Movie is neither horrible or all that good. Stick with Predator.
"A House with a Clock in its Walls" PG
This is a strange Goosebumps like mix match of a beloved children's horror book of the 1980s, and a series, set to the tone of rock movie enthusiast Jack Black and dame of forest elves, Kate Blanchette, as magician sorcerers. Little orphaned boy goes to live with his uncle in his creepy Gothic Victorian house whiled used to be owned by a crazed warlock who put a clock in the house to scare them, and lead to his literal untimely resurrection. Weird chemistry between the leads seems to imply the two of them have a May-December thing. That's when a younger man and an older woman have a thing. However, having just looked into that, both are the same age! They're both 49, but she is made up to be older in the film with platinum hair and make up. This doesn't change the film though, where it is pretty good until the last act, where it turns into kind of a mess similar to the end of Ghostbuster 2016, which just a lot of blasting bewitched things, and a horrible CGI baby Jack. The boy actor is okay in the role. I have not read the books, but Marx Cards has. He has not seen the movie.
"Fahrenheit 11/9" R
Michael Moore of Bowling for Columbine fame returns to the Fahrenheit series for a follow up set during the rise of the Donald Trump administration. The first third of the film is about the bizarre popular vote rending Hilary Clinton loss, and the rise of the unexpected reality TV star, Donald Trump, yo the office of the president. Then he goes on about how previously Obama had finally come to Flint, his hometown, about the bad water, but then made a stunt about it, and did nothing. As best documentary of the year so far, the film does make you think the 2016 election was all rigged from the get go, but not like the conservatives claimed. It was rigged in their favor, and the liberals did no favors to prevent it, and making Hilarly their go to was a bad idea as it turned out. In my reeview, I encouraged them to run Oprah and Jon Stewart. Might as well.
"Small Foot" G
Small Foot is a film told from the perspective of insane Yeti creatures living on a mountain where they were conned by their charismatic leader into believing the lie that they were alone. Seems a lot like politics. Anyway, the WB movie cartoon is also a commentary on reality TV culture, does a good riff on Finding Bigfoot, and has fun with celeb shows with British dudes in them. When a plane crashed on the mountain, the isolated eager and questioning main character tries to prove he saw an actual Small Foot, and allies with the fringe outcasts to prove it. When he gets banished, he finds out that a whole new world lies below.Not a bad cartoon movie, if a little ham fisted.
"A Star is Born" R
All the critical buzz is on point for this film, as Lady Gaga nails a performance tour de force as an up and coming starlet in the fourth adaptation of A Star is Born, a movie made famous by Garland in the 1950s and Streisand in the 1970s. For a rare thing, this is in agreement here. The critics are right, and this should get not only Best Actress, but Best Picture of the Year, so far. The movie tells the story of a drunken falling celebrity cowboy rocker who meets a girl in a drag bar, and they fall in love. She is actually a girl, mind you. Well, just shy of 30, not a 'girl' anymore, but still. The man is called Jackson, and he is doing a spot on Kristofferson imitation, while Gaga seems to channel more Garland than the Babs. It is not payed for comedy. The chemistry they extrude is on point, and not ayt any time cringe worthy. Not just saying that because we're long time GaGa fans. This actually is something. This movie is groundbreaking. It is what La La Land tried to do, but was too campy and lacked some chemistry. You never bought they would be together for long in that movie. You kjnow they must be here, and it must end in typical Hamlet fashion. Everyone is solid from even some old time actors, and some you haven't seen in a while. Alcoholism and depression are themes. Not for children. Please don't take your kids to see this.
Tuesday, August 7, 2018
Up to August in Movies 2018
"Action Point" R
The raunchy Johnny Knoxville story of kind of a younger bad grandpa is set in the early 1980s at the most terrible theme park in the world, Action Point, named after notorious east coast park Action Park. The wrap around is old man Knoxville narrating the story to his daredevil granddaughter, who has a broken leg in a cast. Now in his late 40s, he is too old to be the Jackass daredevil himself, so he and Chris Pontius direct the awful park. It is worth a rental, but possibly proves why there will likely not be a fourth Jackass movie, as they are just too old.
"Incredibles 2" PG
Some 14 years have passed since the Marvel rip off Incredibles, and the sequel acts like there hasn't been but a minute since the last film, and Jack Jack the baby somehow retcons it so his powers are yet to be revealed. Then Mr. Incredble plays Mr. Mom while his wife, Elasti Girl, is pulled into some kind of corporate hero cult. Itis an okay movie, but the icky stuff about the Dad knows best, but is bungling, and the Mom going to work because, the 50s, and that didn't happen then, kind of distracts from the visuals. The chase scenes are the best in cartoons, but the story lacks some polish, and has a villain so obvious that it's as if the studio cut out most of her back story, which it did. Now we know the whole Dad works and Mom is the home maker story was even cheesy in the 1980s, when Mr. Mom came out, of which this is borrowed from, but still. It's okay if you try to ignore that, and the tired Father dude is a bumpkin stereotype, and baby wrecks the house stereotype, and creepy nanny lady stereotype.(It seems like the Simpsons and Family Guy and South Park already did it).
"Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom" PG 13
Three years after the retcon of the JP franchise, the park is crushed, like at the end of movie 3, and the plot of Joe vs the Volcano is crossed with Carnosaur meets the Haunted Mansion. These things are not like the other, but not completely trash. The story has charming leads, but they don't seem to like each other, and the skip to the last two thirds being a dinosaur attack on a bunch of rich dudes at a mansion is a beautiful disaster waiting to happen. It isn't all bad. It is worth a rental. They chose not to have dinos raging through a city, which would have been awesome, and chose just an out of nowhere mansion. The director likes those.
"Ant Man and the Wasp" PG 13
Marvel's Infinity War is happening at the same time Ant Man joines up with the Wasp to stop the Ghost, a phase shifting creature with similar powers to theirs, and yet, Ant Man is on house arrest, and must somehow save the world. This seems oddly shoehorned into the other narrative as though the producers convoluted their heroes into a corner and had to go back and claim somehow the ant guy was actually able to escape the end of IW. Seen enough of these to know that, and Captain Marvel, are happening precisely because of that some convoluted ending, and would be moot if it happened any different. Still, the Ghost idea was interesting, and the motivation of a Marvel villain in constant turmoil was interesting. It also had good wry humor. However, it is odd that the lead lady looks so vastly different with a changed hairstyle, and possibly some other cosmetic changes. She really looks changed from the actress in the original.
"Sorry to Bother You" R
First time director Boots Riley tackles mature and satirical subject matter in this Oakland based fantasy thriller comedy, very similar to the works of Richard Pryor and Rudy Ray Moore, the 'real original kings of comedy'. Luckless hero Cashius (Lakeith Stanfield) is cast into a telemarketer cult office in a weird Twilight Zone version of Oakland where he must put on a 'white man's voice' to become a power seller at the business and go to 'the top levels' of the parent company. Parodies brilliantly race relations stereotypes, makes fun of pop culture and media culture, and even rips on some of the craziest ideas people get for making a fast buck. This comedy fantasy then spends the last half going insane, when our hero, Cash, makes it to the big office and is fed fake coke, and begins to stumble into the 'save horse scandal' of the evil white mastermind, who had enhanced luckless workers into 'horse men'. That is just so insane! Bojack Horsemen insane. So far, this is comedy of the year. It is what a modern Pryor movie would be, if he were still living. It also looks the part of those old 70s exploitation films, and the Dolemite films (Moore). Worth owning on bluray.
"Hotel Transylvania 3" PG
Cute sequel to the comedy series which started around 2013.Mavis takes Dracula and the whole gang on a cruise aboard a Titanic like ship into the Mermuda tringle, and then to Atlantis, while along the way, Erika the Captain and her cyborg Grandfather are trying to get him. Harmless enough movie.
"Mission Impossible Fallout" PG 13
By movie number 6, (and why they didn't make the joke MI6 is beyond ridiculous), Tom Cruise is getting long in the tooth and too old, but still does his own stunts, and Jackie Chaan like broke an ankle on the set, so the movie was delayed for weeks. The final film is a tense action thrill ride, with an excellent set of chases, on the level of the top 10 chases of all time. They're not the best, but they're up there. Follows several tired spy escape cliches, the double, and triple cross, the masked man gag, the mistaken identity gag, the nuke timer ticking down, and the traffic action gag. No, they do not blow up, but they should have. That 15 minutes remaining took them 31 minutes, the greater half of the long final act. Also if Hunt never got caught before, he's not going to die in this one either. James Bond and Arnie fought with helicopters. James Bond dangled from sheer cliffs. Crusie flies into oncoming traffic in France on a motorcycle. Bond chases on rooftops and trains. Yep, you've seen it before, but it's entertaining.
"Christopher Robin" PG
Not to be confused with the 2016 movie, Goodbye Christopher Robin (not seen), this is a cynical version of Hook, where Chris has grown up and become a boring work obsessed man, and his family goes to the cottage while he works, but Pooh bear appears and sends him on an adventure to the cottage to meet his destiny. Either he's completely nuts, or all of this is really happening. It would be a god bet he's gone nuts. It's a nice movie though, despite the washed out looks of the stuffed characters, and it is good that they have return of Cummings doing some of the voices. Something is missing though. And that same street from Potter to Paddington to the upcoming Mary Poppins keeps getting used to the point that it's really obvious.
The raunchy Johnny Knoxville story of kind of a younger bad grandpa is set in the early 1980s at the most terrible theme park in the world, Action Point, named after notorious east coast park Action Park. The wrap around is old man Knoxville narrating the story to his daredevil granddaughter, who has a broken leg in a cast. Now in his late 40s, he is too old to be the Jackass daredevil himself, so he and Chris Pontius direct the awful park. It is worth a rental, but possibly proves why there will likely not be a fourth Jackass movie, as they are just too old.
"Incredibles 2" PG
Some 14 years have passed since the Marvel rip off Incredibles, and the sequel acts like there hasn't been but a minute since the last film, and Jack Jack the baby somehow retcons it so his powers are yet to be revealed. Then Mr. Incredble plays Mr. Mom while his wife, Elasti Girl, is pulled into some kind of corporate hero cult. Itis an okay movie, but the icky stuff about the Dad knows best, but is bungling, and the Mom going to work because, the 50s, and that didn't happen then, kind of distracts from the visuals. The chase scenes are the best in cartoons, but the story lacks some polish, and has a villain so obvious that it's as if the studio cut out most of her back story, which it did. Now we know the whole Dad works and Mom is the home maker story was even cheesy in the 1980s, when Mr. Mom came out, of which this is borrowed from, but still. It's okay if you try to ignore that, and the tired Father dude is a bumpkin stereotype, and baby wrecks the house stereotype, and creepy nanny lady stereotype.(It seems like the Simpsons and Family Guy and South Park already did it).
"Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom" PG 13
Three years after the retcon of the JP franchise, the park is crushed, like at the end of movie 3, and the plot of Joe vs the Volcano is crossed with Carnosaur meets the Haunted Mansion. These things are not like the other, but not completely trash. The story has charming leads, but they don't seem to like each other, and the skip to the last two thirds being a dinosaur attack on a bunch of rich dudes at a mansion is a beautiful disaster waiting to happen. It isn't all bad. It is worth a rental. They chose not to have dinos raging through a city, which would have been awesome, and chose just an out of nowhere mansion. The director likes those.
"Ant Man and the Wasp" PG 13
Marvel's Infinity War is happening at the same time Ant Man joines up with the Wasp to stop the Ghost, a phase shifting creature with similar powers to theirs, and yet, Ant Man is on house arrest, and must somehow save the world. This seems oddly shoehorned into the other narrative as though the producers convoluted their heroes into a corner and had to go back and claim somehow the ant guy was actually able to escape the end of IW. Seen enough of these to know that, and Captain Marvel, are happening precisely because of that some convoluted ending, and would be moot if it happened any different. Still, the Ghost idea was interesting, and the motivation of a Marvel villain in constant turmoil was interesting. It also had good wry humor. However, it is odd that the lead lady looks so vastly different with a changed hairstyle, and possibly some other cosmetic changes. She really looks changed from the actress in the original.
"Sorry to Bother You" R
First time director Boots Riley tackles mature and satirical subject matter in this Oakland based fantasy thriller comedy, very similar to the works of Richard Pryor and Rudy Ray Moore, the 'real original kings of comedy'. Luckless hero Cashius (Lakeith Stanfield) is cast into a telemarketer cult office in a weird Twilight Zone version of Oakland where he must put on a 'white man's voice' to become a power seller at the business and go to 'the top levels' of the parent company. Parodies brilliantly race relations stereotypes, makes fun of pop culture and media culture, and even rips on some of the craziest ideas people get for making a fast buck. This comedy fantasy then spends the last half going insane, when our hero, Cash, makes it to the big office and is fed fake coke, and begins to stumble into the 'save horse scandal' of the evil white mastermind, who had enhanced luckless workers into 'horse men'. That is just so insane! Bojack Horsemen insane. So far, this is comedy of the year. It is what a modern Pryor movie would be, if he were still living. It also looks the part of those old 70s exploitation films, and the Dolemite films (Moore). Worth owning on bluray.
"Hotel Transylvania 3" PG
Cute sequel to the comedy series which started around 2013.Mavis takes Dracula and the whole gang on a cruise aboard a Titanic like ship into the Mermuda tringle, and then to Atlantis, while along the way, Erika the Captain and her cyborg Grandfather are trying to get him. Harmless enough movie.
"Mission Impossible Fallout" PG 13
By movie number 6, (and why they didn't make the joke MI6 is beyond ridiculous), Tom Cruise is getting long in the tooth and too old, but still does his own stunts, and Jackie Chaan like broke an ankle on the set, so the movie was delayed for weeks. The final film is a tense action thrill ride, with an excellent set of chases, on the level of the top 10 chases of all time. They're not the best, but they're up there. Follows several tired spy escape cliches, the double, and triple cross, the masked man gag, the mistaken identity gag, the nuke timer ticking down, and the traffic action gag. No, they do not blow up, but they should have. That 15 minutes remaining took them 31 minutes, the greater half of the long final act. Also if Hunt never got caught before, he's not going to die in this one either. James Bond and Arnie fought with helicopters. James Bond dangled from sheer cliffs. Crusie flies into oncoming traffic in France on a motorcycle. Bond chases on rooftops and trains. Yep, you've seen it before, but it's entertaining.
"Christopher Robin" PG
Not to be confused with the 2016 movie, Goodbye Christopher Robin (not seen), this is a cynical version of Hook, where Chris has grown up and become a boring work obsessed man, and his family goes to the cottage while he works, but Pooh bear appears and sends him on an adventure to the cottage to meet his destiny. Either he's completely nuts, or all of this is really happening. It would be a god bet he's gone nuts. It's a nice movie though, despite the washed out looks of the stuffed characters, and it is good that they have return of Cummings doing some of the voices. Something is missing though. And that same street from Potter to Paddington to the upcoming Mary Poppins keeps getting used to the point that it's really obvious.
Thursday, May 31, 2018
May in Movies
"Deadpool 2"
The Merch with the Mouth is back in his second raunchy film,and he's fighting Cable this time, because he has traveled through time to kill the future Fire Fist before he can kill the Essex school master jerk guy. The X Men show up and try reasoning with him. Battles happen. Still really, we could have done without another tiny body parts during regeneration gag. The time travel as reset is used to kind of mess with the reality of the whole thing, but okay. It really is a nod to the 1990s X Force and X Men cartoons more than the comics. Not bad. Not great.
"Batman Ninja"
The highly anticipated blu ray release of this odd high concept Batman steampunk story, where a time traveling Gorilla Grog takes all the main villains back into time and space to feudal Japan, and Batman and some of the Robins, to have them battle. The dubbing on the dubbed version is cool, but some of the voices get quiet. The Joker is delightfully insane, as is Harley. The guy playing Batman does a pretty good imitation of a Keaton era Batman, with a little Nolan era in the end. The film went direct to video and yet is one of the better DC animated batman concepts of late.
"Solo: A Star Wars Story"
If Revenge of the Sith took place about 13 years ago in the original universe, then this is in that universe, or five years before Rogue One, and A New Hope, 18 years after Revenge of the Sith. This is thus canon with Clone Wars the cartoon and Rebels. Seems it's a love letter to the EU. Young Han becomes Solo (by a cheeky name change) and goes into the 'service' but is a deserter when he meets some rebels, and they want him to go on a mission to steal some energy canisters off a train. Then the marauders take the booty, and kill the leader's wife, so Han finds another way, he goes gambling. It's not Canto Bight. It's some other place. Anyway, there he meets Lando the Calrissian. Later, they go on a heist on planet Kessel, (with spice mines like Dune)and go on the...Kessel Run! A cheeky reference to that has been in every classic movie, and the 12 'parsecs' are explained away as 'normally it takes 20, but we rounded up', but still a parsec is a unit of time, not distance! Yep, everything you might expect, playing it safe mostly, and ending with no real 'subversion'. The problem is this movie is weak on the 'new and different' and doesn't go anywhere you would not expect.
So the timelines kind of look like this.
The Phantom Menace, year 1
Attack of the Clones, year 11
Revenge of the Sith, year 15 (Luke and Leia born),
Han Solo, year 20
Rogue One, year 32
A New Hope, year 33, (Luke and Leia 18)
The Empire Strikes Back, year 35
Return of the Jedi, year 38 (Luke nearly finishes training, Vader defeated, Leia and Han going to have baby, future Kylo)
The Force Awakens, year 68, (Ben Solo/Kylo Ren is 30),
The Last Jedi, year 69
The First Order, ?? *My guess on the title.
So, I liked the movie just fine. It didn't bother me the actor was one head too short to play Han. The annoying femme bot did not really do much except be like Threepio in smugness.
And no, net fan boys, Lando never once pretends to be metro or pan sexual, not once, in the film. He's just flirty. He was a Casanova type flirt in the original. You are reading too much into that. It would have been cool if he was into anything, and he did diddle a robot, but he didn't explicitly claim he wanted Han. Now as for Chewie and Han...oh my.Just kidding. Or am I? Ha.
The Merch with the Mouth is back in his second raunchy film,and he's fighting Cable this time, because he has traveled through time to kill the future Fire Fist before he can kill the Essex school master jerk guy. The X Men show up and try reasoning with him. Battles happen. Still really, we could have done without another tiny body parts during regeneration gag. The time travel as reset is used to kind of mess with the reality of the whole thing, but okay. It really is a nod to the 1990s X Force and X Men cartoons more than the comics. Not bad. Not great.
"Batman Ninja"
The highly anticipated blu ray release of this odd high concept Batman steampunk story, where a time traveling Gorilla Grog takes all the main villains back into time and space to feudal Japan, and Batman and some of the Robins, to have them battle. The dubbing on the dubbed version is cool, but some of the voices get quiet. The Joker is delightfully insane, as is Harley. The guy playing Batman does a pretty good imitation of a Keaton era Batman, with a little Nolan era in the end. The film went direct to video and yet is one of the better DC animated batman concepts of late.
"Solo: A Star Wars Story"
If Revenge of the Sith took place about 13 years ago in the original universe, then this is in that universe, or five years before Rogue One, and A New Hope, 18 years after Revenge of the Sith. This is thus canon with Clone Wars the cartoon and Rebels. Seems it's a love letter to the EU. Young Han becomes Solo (by a cheeky name change) and goes into the 'service' but is a deserter when he meets some rebels, and they want him to go on a mission to steal some energy canisters off a train. Then the marauders take the booty, and kill the leader's wife, so Han finds another way, he goes gambling. It's not Canto Bight. It's some other place. Anyway, there he meets Lando the Calrissian. Later, they go on a heist on planet Kessel, (with spice mines like Dune)and go on the...Kessel Run! A cheeky reference to that has been in every classic movie, and the 12 'parsecs' are explained away as 'normally it takes 20, but we rounded up', but still a parsec is a unit of time, not distance! Yep, everything you might expect, playing it safe mostly, and ending with no real 'subversion'. The problem is this movie is weak on the 'new and different' and doesn't go anywhere you would not expect.
So the timelines kind of look like this.
The Phantom Menace, year 1
Attack of the Clones, year 11
Revenge of the Sith, year 15 (Luke and Leia born),
Han Solo, year 20
Rogue One, year 32
A New Hope, year 33, (Luke and Leia 18)
The Empire Strikes Back, year 35
Return of the Jedi, year 38 (Luke nearly finishes training, Vader defeated, Leia and Han going to have baby, future Kylo)
The Force Awakens, year 68, (Ben Solo/Kylo Ren is 30),
The Last Jedi, year 69
The First Order, ?? *My guess on the title.
So, I liked the movie just fine. It didn't bother me the actor was one head too short to play Han. The annoying femme bot did not really do much except be like Threepio in smugness.
And no, net fan boys, Lando never once pretends to be metro or pan sexual, not once, in the film. He's just flirty. He was a Casanova type flirt in the original. You are reading too much into that. It would have been cool if he was into anything, and he did diddle a robot, but he didn't explicitly claim he wanted Han. Now as for Chewie and Han...oh my.Just kidding. Or am I? Ha.
April in Movies
"Cock Blockers"
This raunchy comedy about three girl friends attempting to get laid at prom is at lot funnier than it should be. Had it been three guys, it would have sucked, but because it's three girls, and their parents chase them, it's somehow better. The adults do chew scenery more so than the leads, and even steal their thunder. Despite confusing editing involving times they go and come from a hotel, clothing they should not have in the next scene anymore, and confusing placement of a stereotyped male model, the movie is fine. It's okay. The title is often said to be 'Blockers' but it has astyliezed rooster, so it's 'cock blockers', a term from millennials.
"Isle of Dogs"
The strange Wes Anderson film that makes you say 'I love dogs', is a cute go motion animated, stop motion enhanced fable of a future where in Japan they have outlawed dogs due to a dog flu, and cast them out into an island. Then a dog is wrongfully sent there, leading to his boy trying to rescue him. The combination of Japanese and dubbed English speaking actors is not nearly as confusing as one might think. The story is not race baiting or anything controversial. The only thing shocking is an operation scene. Some of the visuals may be confusing, but it works. It is not really for small children though.
"Avengers Infinity War"
The ten years of Marvel Disney culminates in a spring movie literally on the heels of the last one, 'Black Panther', as both were still playing together when it came out! Thanos the Mad Titan wants the magic infinity stones to rid the universe of half of everything, and restore balance, and the super heroes are out to stop him. Ridding the universe of heroes would be bad for business! The team up of the Avengers, Spider Man and Thor, and Doctor Strange, and Hulk, and various others is an action spectacle from deep space, where the Guardians of the Galaxy appear, to Wakanda on Earth! Disney took some risks with this film, and it went there. (It is still playing). Worth owning later on blu ray.
This raunchy comedy about three girl friends attempting to get laid at prom is at lot funnier than it should be. Had it been three guys, it would have sucked, but because it's three girls, and their parents chase them, it's somehow better. The adults do chew scenery more so than the leads, and even steal their thunder. Despite confusing editing involving times they go and come from a hotel, clothing they should not have in the next scene anymore, and confusing placement of a stereotyped male model, the movie is fine. It's okay. The title is often said to be 'Blockers' but it has astyliezed rooster, so it's 'cock blockers', a term from millennials.
"Isle of Dogs"
The strange Wes Anderson film that makes you say 'I love dogs', is a cute go motion animated, stop motion enhanced fable of a future where in Japan they have outlawed dogs due to a dog flu, and cast them out into an island. Then a dog is wrongfully sent there, leading to his boy trying to rescue him. The combination of Japanese and dubbed English speaking actors is not nearly as confusing as one might think. The story is not race baiting or anything controversial. The only thing shocking is an operation scene. Some of the visuals may be confusing, but it works. It is not really for small children though.
"Avengers Infinity War"
The ten years of Marvel Disney culminates in a spring movie literally on the heels of the last one, 'Black Panther', as both were still playing together when it came out! Thanos the Mad Titan wants the magic infinity stones to rid the universe of half of everything, and restore balance, and the super heroes are out to stop him. Ridding the universe of heroes would be bad for business! The team up of the Avengers, Spider Man and Thor, and Doctor Strange, and Hulk, and various others is an action spectacle from deep space, where the Guardians of the Galaxy appear, to Wakanda on Earth! Disney took some risks with this film, and it went there. (It is still playing). Worth owning later on blu ray.
March 2018 in Movies
"Death Wish"
Bruce Willis does a remake of a movie that defined the vigilante franchise, about a decade or so too late. It's not that he's bad as Death Wish, who is out to kill those who have murdered his wife, but he's terrible at convincing you he's not a Doctor Strange rip off as his alter ego. Without the magic though, he's not Strange, just strange. He's not supposed to be likeable. The movie is not all that good. Sure it has some kills, but video games are more violent. (Double feature special with Red Sparrow).
"Red Sparrow"
After the slog of sitting through Death Wish, it was a nice surprise to sit through a hilarious dark comedy about Russian spies played by a campy set of supporting actors, and Jen Lawrence in the lead had such a funny accent! The problem was, none of this was a comedy. It didn't intend to be. This girl witnesses a murder and is drafted into a super secret spy agency by her spy uncle, but it turns out the school is also 'whore school' for the depraved schoolmaster lady, and there she learns to exploit her talents, ahem, but drops out. Then she becomes a super agent anyway and goes on a mission, where she has unconvincing relations with an American double agent who looks like a guy from another film, but wasn't him. Despite the alleged 'agent female empowerment' scene where she stops the creeper guy, it is not, it is exploitation because she is told to do it. Yet another movie where the only nude scene is so dreary and yucky you want to shower after seeing it. How is that fun? But it is a fake Russian movie. Actually, it is a rip off of Atomic Blonde, a much better movie, with a better nude scene, also dreary though, but there Theron is taking a bath, so it is empowering. Ha.
(Double feature special with Death Wish).
"A Wrinkle In Time"
This fantasy film remake of a film and TV film from decades back is an odd duck of a movie. It tries so hard to be racially neutral and girl power edgy at the same time it misses the point of being fun. Oprah chews scenery as a space goddess, but sure, she thinks she is anyway. The odd casting of Chris Pine as the missing Dad is confusing, more so than the casting of the lead, who is forgettable in the role. The big name actresses keep stealing all the good lines. It's not her fault. She was good in other movies. The fantasy idea that this little magical girl can somehow make physic work completely differently from how they would is not a problem, as that's in the book, but she also rides a flowing cabbage lady through the sky, and that was when everyone zoned out. The script for this had to be a mess. Meh.
"Tomb Raider"
The remake of Tomb Raider follows more closely the games than the previous films did, with a new person filling in for now too old Jolie, although she was forgettable in the part. The bad guys get more screen time than her, as does her uninteresting partner, a grumpy ship captain. And how did a model Sony camcorder from the late 1990s and battery remain intact and operating for 20 years? That model didn't last an hour without recharging! Even if she plugged it in, and she didn't, it would have a super 8 style micro tape so degraded, it would not be playable. The twist at the end was fun though, as the idea of an ancient queen of death is different. No, it might seem like the ending of that horrid Mummy remake, but it's not.Worth a bargain rental.
"Pacific Rim Uprising"
Alien monsters are back to destroy Earth, and it's up to the Yeager robots to destroy them. No, it's not Transformers, but something else, a title with a brunt of butt jokes, Pacific Rim! Del Toro did not want to touch another Pacific Rim movie, giving it to another director, and the guy made the Star Wars dude the hero, as the son of the hero from the last one. So it is basically a high concept Robot Jox 2. It is also unfortunately too much like a Transformers clone, while trying to be a Robotech clone with 'edgy talking space marines' and stuff. It's not terrible. It has some moments. The villain is an insane type Robotech stock villain, and comes off as a parody of them, but also of Dr. Hyde from that Mummy movie.
"Ready Player One"
Forty years in the future, everyone plays a pedantic quest video game modeled after a rich game master's 1980s obsessions, and to win it, a kid from the 'stacks' of this crowded city must go into the internet to play it, over and over. Based on a book that Marx Cards loved, the film is well, a version of it. At times, the story drips nostalgia, with a cowboy Iron Giant, and Akira bike, and even a Back to the Future/Knight Rider kit bash car, but at other times it misses the mark. The book had a Voltron. The movie has a lesser known Gundam. The Iron Giant uses guns (when he should be a pacifist). The movie has no sign of Transformers, anywhere. (They do include the space battleship Yamato aka the Argo though in a brief clip, misquote online as an SDF One from Robotech, but it's the Yamato, as it has one central wave cannon, not two). Going really fast backward would have occurred to 'every gamer in the game'! Th clues were not similar to those in the book. This didn't make it bad, but different. The average looking gamer girl of the book is replaced by a smoking hot girl in the movie who has an anime style birthmark. The eventual conclusion is reached weirdly. The movie is not bad, but not great. It's like a well done bootleg game with cheat codes, and nothing like Pixels.
Bruce Willis does a remake of a movie that defined the vigilante franchise, about a decade or so too late. It's not that he's bad as Death Wish, who is out to kill those who have murdered his wife, but he's terrible at convincing you he's not a Doctor Strange rip off as his alter ego. Without the magic though, he's not Strange, just strange. He's not supposed to be likeable. The movie is not all that good. Sure it has some kills, but video games are more violent. (Double feature special with Red Sparrow).
"Red Sparrow"
After the slog of sitting through Death Wish, it was a nice surprise to sit through a hilarious dark comedy about Russian spies played by a campy set of supporting actors, and Jen Lawrence in the lead had such a funny accent! The problem was, none of this was a comedy. It didn't intend to be. This girl witnesses a murder and is drafted into a super secret spy agency by her spy uncle, but it turns out the school is also 'whore school' for the depraved schoolmaster lady, and there she learns to exploit her talents, ahem, but drops out. Then she becomes a super agent anyway and goes on a mission, where she has unconvincing relations with an American double agent who looks like a guy from another film, but wasn't him. Despite the alleged 'agent female empowerment' scene where she stops the creeper guy, it is not, it is exploitation because she is told to do it. Yet another movie where the only nude scene is so dreary and yucky you want to shower after seeing it. How is that fun? But it is a fake Russian movie. Actually, it is a rip off of Atomic Blonde, a much better movie, with a better nude scene, also dreary though, but there Theron is taking a bath, so it is empowering. Ha.
(Double feature special with Death Wish).
"A Wrinkle In Time"
This fantasy film remake of a film and TV film from decades back is an odd duck of a movie. It tries so hard to be racially neutral and girl power edgy at the same time it misses the point of being fun. Oprah chews scenery as a space goddess, but sure, she thinks she is anyway. The odd casting of Chris Pine as the missing Dad is confusing, more so than the casting of the lead, who is forgettable in the role. The big name actresses keep stealing all the good lines. It's not her fault. She was good in other movies. The fantasy idea that this little magical girl can somehow make physic work completely differently from how they would is not a problem, as that's in the book, but she also rides a flowing cabbage lady through the sky, and that was when everyone zoned out. The script for this had to be a mess. Meh.
"Tomb Raider"
The remake of Tomb Raider follows more closely the games than the previous films did, with a new person filling in for now too old Jolie, although she was forgettable in the part. The bad guys get more screen time than her, as does her uninteresting partner, a grumpy ship captain. And how did a model Sony camcorder from the late 1990s and battery remain intact and operating for 20 years? That model didn't last an hour without recharging! Even if she plugged it in, and she didn't, it would have a super 8 style micro tape so degraded, it would not be playable. The twist at the end was fun though, as the idea of an ancient queen of death is different. No, it might seem like the ending of that horrid Mummy remake, but it's not.Worth a bargain rental.
"Pacific Rim Uprising"
Alien monsters are back to destroy Earth, and it's up to the Yeager robots to destroy them. No, it's not Transformers, but something else, a title with a brunt of butt jokes, Pacific Rim! Del Toro did not want to touch another Pacific Rim movie, giving it to another director, and the guy made the Star Wars dude the hero, as the son of the hero from the last one. So it is basically a high concept Robot Jox 2. It is also unfortunately too much like a Transformers clone, while trying to be a Robotech clone with 'edgy talking space marines' and stuff. It's not terrible. It has some moments. The villain is an insane type Robotech stock villain, and comes off as a parody of them, but also of Dr. Hyde from that Mummy movie.
"Ready Player One"
Forty years in the future, everyone plays a pedantic quest video game modeled after a rich game master's 1980s obsessions, and to win it, a kid from the 'stacks' of this crowded city must go into the internet to play it, over and over. Based on a book that Marx Cards loved, the film is well, a version of it. At times, the story drips nostalgia, with a cowboy Iron Giant, and Akira bike, and even a Back to the Future/Knight Rider kit bash car, but at other times it misses the mark. The book had a Voltron. The movie has a lesser known Gundam. The Iron Giant uses guns (when he should be a pacifist). The movie has no sign of Transformers, anywhere. (They do include the space battleship Yamato aka the Argo though in a brief clip, misquote online as an SDF One from Robotech, but it's the Yamato, as it has one central wave cannon, not two). Going really fast backward would have occurred to 'every gamer in the game'! Th clues were not similar to those in the book. This didn't make it bad, but different. The average looking gamer girl of the book is replaced by a smoking hot girl in the movie who has an anime style birthmark. The eventual conclusion is reached weirdly. The movie is not bad, but not great. It's like a well done bootleg game with cheat codes, and nothing like Pixels.
February 2018 In Movies
"The Shape of Water"
This quirky retread of The Creature from the Black Lagoon went on to be nominated, and won, Best Picture of the Year. The other movies were too dower. The film is about a comely woman employee at a lab who falls for a captured mutant sea monster. The art inspired one of the great shipping artists. It seems to pay homage to old films as well. It is a period piece set in the 1960s. The bad guy chews scenery, and his fingers, literally. The woman is mute. The woman's landlord is closeted. It is really Oscar bait for sure.
"The Post"
This odd prequel to All the President's Men is a Spielberg attempt to get yet another Oscar to go with his other ones. At times a pedantic slog, but the awards show likes that. Funniest mess up they did not notice, no way could the spy have used a modern photocopier to copy those 'Pentagon Papers', as all they had in 1971 or so was the blue ink 'mimeograph' copiers. The Xerox company would not exist until 1978. Also the trucks were the wrong color for the Post at the time. Despite that, the acting was solid, and it got some Oscars.
"Cloverfield Paradox"
This Netflix movie surprised by appearing the week of the Super Bowl, but it was mostly a pedestrian Alien 3/Life rip off, with some wrap around extra dull stuff about Cloverfield tossed in. It might have been better as just an Alien rip off, just like Cloverfield Lane would have been better as just 'The Cellar'. Yawn.
"The Greatest Showman"
This movie proves 'there is an Oscar movie born every minute' as Hugh Jackman plays PT Barnum, and the story adds a forced stage singer love interest, who was not really like that. Also newspapers didn't look like that in the period. Musical elements were fun though and the heart wrenching song about the disenchanted circus actress who longed to be someone special was nice.
"Marvel's Black Panther"
Coming off the 'implied risk' of DC making a Wonder Woman flick, already in production Marvel film Black Panther tackled the first black superhero movie, especially after WW made a ton of money on the other side. So basically it is not offensive to call it 'The Lion King' meets Hamlet, but odd that TLK is a Hamlet movie (and a wee bit of Othello). The Panther mus claim the kingdom after the death of his Father, but a cousin from the past comes to claim the throne for his own. It had everyone going "Wakanda forever!" in malls, and played for an amazing several months, actually butting up with 'Avengers Infinity War', its own sequel, in May! Fantasy place Wakanda seems a kind of super advanced Congo. No Oscar bait here, but a lot of fun.
"Annihilation"
A space rock crashes into New England beach area causing a bizarre fractal world to break into the universe, so a team of people are sent in, and don't come out, causing them to send in another. This bizarre little scifi horror movie is actually awesome, but disappeared quickly because of bad timing. It had the feel of big ideas, and discovery, and had mutations run amok as a theme. The idea of an alien 'invasion' where the creature just wants to 'exist' is interesting. Just so happens, his arrival is destroying the area. Worth a blu ray release buy.
See my reviews on WeirdKitty07 on YouTube.
This quirky retread of The Creature from the Black Lagoon went on to be nominated, and won, Best Picture of the Year. The other movies were too dower. The film is about a comely woman employee at a lab who falls for a captured mutant sea monster. The art inspired one of the great shipping artists. It seems to pay homage to old films as well. It is a period piece set in the 1960s. The bad guy chews scenery, and his fingers, literally. The woman is mute. The woman's landlord is closeted. It is really Oscar bait for sure.
"The Post"
This odd prequel to All the President's Men is a Spielberg attempt to get yet another Oscar to go with his other ones. At times a pedantic slog, but the awards show likes that. Funniest mess up they did not notice, no way could the spy have used a modern photocopier to copy those 'Pentagon Papers', as all they had in 1971 or so was the blue ink 'mimeograph' copiers. The Xerox company would not exist until 1978. Also the trucks were the wrong color for the Post at the time. Despite that, the acting was solid, and it got some Oscars.
"Cloverfield Paradox"
This Netflix movie surprised by appearing the week of the Super Bowl, but it was mostly a pedestrian Alien 3/Life rip off, with some wrap around extra dull stuff about Cloverfield tossed in. It might have been better as just an Alien rip off, just like Cloverfield Lane would have been better as just 'The Cellar'. Yawn.
"The Greatest Showman"
This movie proves 'there is an Oscar movie born every minute' as Hugh Jackman plays PT Barnum, and the story adds a forced stage singer love interest, who was not really like that. Also newspapers didn't look like that in the period. Musical elements were fun though and the heart wrenching song about the disenchanted circus actress who longed to be someone special was nice.
"Marvel's Black Panther"
Coming off the 'implied risk' of DC making a Wonder Woman flick, already in production Marvel film Black Panther tackled the first black superhero movie, especially after WW made a ton of money on the other side. So basically it is not offensive to call it 'The Lion King' meets Hamlet, but odd that TLK is a Hamlet movie (and a wee bit of Othello). The Panther mus claim the kingdom after the death of his Father, but a cousin from the past comes to claim the throne for his own. It had everyone going "Wakanda forever!" in malls, and played for an amazing several months, actually butting up with 'Avengers Infinity War', its own sequel, in May! Fantasy place Wakanda seems a kind of super advanced Congo. No Oscar bait here, but a lot of fun.
"Annihilation"
A space rock crashes into New England beach area causing a bizarre fractal world to break into the universe, so a team of people are sent in, and don't come out, causing them to send in another. This bizarre little scifi horror movie is actually awesome, but disappeared quickly because of bad timing. It had the feel of big ideas, and discovery, and had mutations run amok as a theme. The idea of an alien 'invasion' where the creature just wants to 'exist' is interesting. Just so happens, his arrival is destroying the area. Worth a blu ray release buy.
See my reviews on WeirdKitty07 on YouTube.
Tuesday, February 13, 2018
Now in 2018 is Oscar worth the wait?
It is now February 2018 and the last of the Oscar bait movies are out, and there really is nothing new under the sun.
"The Post" is by the numbers, even as a sort of prequel to "All the President's Men". It does give some nice voice to the leads, but the movie is kind of pedestrian and at times so uneven it makes you nod off.
"The Greatest Showman" is a musical nod to musicals, with fine enough acting leads, but it so muddies the story of PT Barnum, and adds people that didn't exist, that like the epic Titanic, which also had two leads that really did not exist, wouldn't be much without them. The romantic interest between the trapeze girl and the backer guy never happened. The rest is a decent actor nod for the former Wolverine.
"The Shape of Water" is a brilliant and quirky story of a woman who falls for a sea creature, and seems utterly insane, but turns out charming. The villain chews so much scenery he even chews of his rotting digits at one point. The fish like merman has a surprise ability. It won't win the Oscar as it is too weird. Still it is one of the best of the year.
"The Darkest Hours" was not seen.
"Lady Bird" was not seen.
"Cloverfield Paradox" technically is a 2018 movie and not remotely worth an Oscar.
So, in the weeks since last posting, no other new movies have really stuck out, so the reviews from last December still stand, and I've added only one standout, "Shape of Water" to the mix.
I really don't have plans to watch the Oscar show this year, as there really isn't much reason to.
"The Post" is by the numbers, even as a sort of prequel to "All the President's Men". It does give some nice voice to the leads, but the movie is kind of pedestrian and at times so uneven it makes you nod off.
"The Greatest Showman" is a musical nod to musicals, with fine enough acting leads, but it so muddies the story of PT Barnum, and adds people that didn't exist, that like the epic Titanic, which also had two leads that really did not exist, wouldn't be much without them. The romantic interest between the trapeze girl and the backer guy never happened. The rest is a decent actor nod for the former Wolverine.
"The Shape of Water" is a brilliant and quirky story of a woman who falls for a sea creature, and seems utterly insane, but turns out charming. The villain chews so much scenery he even chews of his rotting digits at one point. The fish like merman has a surprise ability. It won't win the Oscar as it is too weird. Still it is one of the best of the year.
"The Darkest Hours" was not seen.
"Lady Bird" was not seen.
"Cloverfield Paradox" technically is a 2018 movie and not remotely worth an Oscar.
So, in the weeks since last posting, no other new movies have really stuck out, so the reviews from last December still stand, and I've added only one standout, "Shape of Water" to the mix.
I really don't have plans to watch the Oscar show this year, as there really isn't much reason to.
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