Star Wars: Episode II Attack of the Clones
PG
Bring in the clones! Dah ha! In part
2 of the prequels that smell freshly, it's 9 years later, or so, and Anakin has
grown into...a snotty annoying teenager with powers...yipee! Padme Amidala is a
senator. Politics goes out the window, with the Jedi, chasing assassins over
lavish FX for several minutes. Obi Wan investigates a clone planet and fins out
about a strange army he didn't order. Palpatane makes himself supreme
chancellor, and you'd think someone would notice he's evil by now. But no. The
lovelorn couple, Annie and Amy, go to planet Naboo on orders from the Jedi, but
they bust out and head to Tatooine, where Anacin gets a headache and finds out
his Mommy is about to die, even though for like 10 years he didn't bother to rescue
her, and he goes and kills some sand people, to which Amidala wants to make out
with him, rather than think he's a total murdering psycho. Then Count Dookie,
er Dokuu, gets into a big fight with Anakin, Obi Wan, and Yoda, and Yoda flies
around like he is made out of Looney Tunes rubber. Uhu. And the clones get into
this big fight too. Cool SFX do not make a good movie. Review by Adam Browne
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